[Poet breaks transfer record] Europe/Arts [25/01/06]
Reclusive Belgian hyper|realist poet Nico de Borst has set a new record for a poets transfer with an astonishing fee of 3.6 million Euros. His move from the Dutch publishing giant EK to rising American publishing house Farrel-Reed has surprised many industry insiders.
De Borst, the multi award winning poet, has been reticent to speak about the spiralling fees demanded by writers.
"Money words are foolish. Only poem words are like bread and cake." he said.
But his position as a person who renounces wealth was questioned by many when it was discovered he had recently placed an order for a gold plated Fiat Uno and had taken delivery of an antique jade toilet, bought at auction from the private collection of multi million pound Dutch international footballer Freddi Hertz.
De Borsts's agent Piet Hoogarde [pictured here at his alligator sanctuary near Bremen] is furious at the reaction from rival publishers and critics. His recent comments in literary magazines have further inflamed the already acrimonious debate.
"This roll of Euro money could be jammed hard into my own anus space, it is of no great importance" says Hoogarde. "This whole shitkettle is not about money, it is about the greatest poet of a generation and the real jealousy of other rhyme men and publishers."
Hounded relentlessly by the literary paparazzi and hordes of retarded poetry lovers, De Borst has made no further comment regarding the issue of transfer fees and is rumoured to be in hiding at his home just outside the picturesque Belgian farming town of Gent. A spokesman for Farrel-Reed, the poets new publishers, made a brief press statement to waiting reporters and press:
'We at Farrel-Reed feel all who are critical should heed the words of Nico's stunning words in his poem 'Regal Ordure':
aSking the eye|god, througH abdomens of Ire
we are headsTock rigid, as our babies sing Elvi$
This story promises to take a further twist when De Borsts new volume of poetry 'Pigs, Sand and Football' [his homage to the Spanish town of Magaluf] is released sometime before the winter.
Greta Toller [ArtsEurope].
Volatile West coast rapper 'Pippy' Shanks will appear before the Californian Supreme Court on four counts of dissemination of sexual material. The indictments come after raids on the rappers Beverly Hills home which resulted in the seizure of illegal video and DVD material and a small quantity of narcotics.
The films show acts of sexual intercourse between farm animals and other farm animals [no human actors are involved]. This new genre of sexual material comes from the company that produced 'Bogporn' a highly derided and recently banned low-budget 'sexploitation' movie involving Americans of Irish descent dressed as leprechauns.
[Poet breaks transfer record] Europe/Arts [25/01/06]
